A female figure waves a huge, dark-red flag against a black background. — Red Flags in Polyamory

Polyamory may be a wonderful thing, but no relationship model is perfect. There are plenty of ways people can hurt you, either on purpose or unintentionally.

That is why you need to be aware of Polyamory Red Flags.

Red Flags are the signs that serve as a warning of upcoming dangers. They are the universal indicators given off by people or situations that tell you to keep your distance. Some of us have learned them through experience, but this way involves having to endure and then process the pain and damage caused. And so, we gather and share our collected knowledge in the hope we can prevent anyone else from going through the same thing.

And so, if you're looking to explore any form of ethical non-monogamy, please take a moment to learn some of the more common Polyamory Red Flags.

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What Is Hierarchical Polyamory (And Is It Toxic)?

While Hierarchical Polyamory can be used as a tool of control, I don't believe it is inherently toxic. It is possible to create healthy, ethical, hierarchical polyamorous relationships. But that can only work if people understand what they are getting into.

So, let's take a moment to explore the concept of Hierarchical Polyamory and whether or not it's always unethical.

What is “Polybombing”?

There is a difference between "polybombing" and "dropping the poly bomb", and it's important to know which is which.

What is a One Penis Policy, And Why is it Bad?

Believe it or not, there is a difference between a One Penis Policy and a relationship dynamic with only one penis.

Polyamory Does Not Equal Consent

If you have ever had a partner use an argument along the lines of "Well, you agreed to an open relationship, so what I did was fine," then they are not thinking about you as a person but as a tool to fulfil their needs and fantasies.

They are not looking at you as a human being but as an object to be manipulated and used.

Red Flags in Polyamory: Refusing Labels

While it's fine that someone may want to avoid using certain labels in polyamory, refusing to use any at all is a Polyamory Red Flag.

Red Flags in Polyamory: Pushy/Pressurised Polyamory

There can be a fine line between encouraging someone to try something new and pressuring them into something they don't want to do. This is why you need to be aware of the Polyamory Red Flag of Pushy or Pressurised Polyamory.

Red Flags in Polyamory: Pretend/Uncertain Polyamory

Sometimes, when you're certain about something, it can be difficult to see that other people don't feel the same way.

Red Flags in Polyamory: One-Sided Polyamory

It doesn't matter why or how polyamory can become one-sided. All that matters is the Red Flag things are becoming toxic.

Red Flags in Polyamory: Aggressive Fairness

While fairness between relationships seems like a no-brainer, it's very easy for this line of thinking to become toxic if you go about it the wrong way.